Today

Yep, today was another unproductive day. I woke up so so late and I had that waking-up-late headache. I only went out of my room twice today, to grab something for brunch and dinner. I didn't do shower, but I put on a lot of my adidas cologne, so if you passed me by today, you might not tell haha.

I re-watched Mad Men episodes today, loved it, as always. I also did my macroeconomics' assignment. Well, I actually had got this bunch of assignments, but, I wasn't in the mood to do the others. And that's it, that's all I did today.

One thing I realized today, my eye sight has gotten so worse that I couldn't read a line without my stupid-looking glasses. I've had that sunglasses since about 3 years ago, but I never had to use it regularly. Today I couldn't even read caf's menu, my emails, and texts in Humber TV ads. Ugh that was the last thing I ever want to happen to me, I hate lenses and I just don't want to wear glasses everyday HHH.

Anyway, the other day, I read a question in my friend's tumblr asking the meaning of happiness. One user answered 'to have a productive time'. He is wrong! You know what, Today, when I imagined myself doing lots of stuffs or visiting a good resto in downtown instead,  I felt like I couldn't be happier with the peace and ease of just being unproductive.

Then I came to think. Some people really frame themselves with this set of rules and principles to become happy, some people, like Jack Canfield, build people's dreams with this so-called accurate method to be successful (I used to believe in those things too). But I tell you what, they are WRONG. Things are very very flexible. Some people are successful without having the so-called communication or leadership skills. Sigur Ros is a rock band. Bad childhood doesn't always turn people into physco, so on and so forth.

It is just so silly when people telling me what to do or how things should be done. Cause there really is no absolute formula out there and I don't feel it's necessary to change a thing in me. 

Believe nothing, that's the simplest way to live happily and properly.

:-|

I keep having 8-9 hours of night sleep and  2-4 hours of nap every single day. I forget when exactly I started doing this, it's been going on for so long like if I could get paid for sleeping, I would have been Donald Trump. Seriously, all I've been doing these days are just lock myself up in my room, listen to records all day, then get back to sleep. I've been very very lazy. I don't eat out much anymore, I don't come to parties anymore, I don't take pictures, I am basically just dead.

Is it wrong? Is it wrong that my mood tells me not to care about anything? Is it wrong if all I wanna do is ... geeve?

I would want to use the remote from 'click', and put just couple more weeks on autopilot. Cause you know what, this feels so fucking good. I don't need meth or weed, I just want to sleep and have the luxury to ignore all shits happening in the world.

I don't care if Jackie hires somebody else for her lookbook. I don't care if I don't get that fucking honours pin. I don't care if I don't get to finish my book and get it published. I don't care if war's started somewhere (okay that sounds terrible), but I just don't. Um, well ...  I do care about school. My finals are in two weeks, and I know I've sacrificed a lot to be here, I don't want to disappoint my parents either, but, I just want to fucking sleep and find everything is fucking normal when I am ready to wake up. Is that really too much to ask?

Transfer

I know it's been like a century since the last time I posted in this blog (and the other blogs too). I have been extremely unproductive and lazy lately, but, the point is, I just want you folks to know that I'm alive and still blogging. I just saw my blog's stats and I am very grateful to know that I have got a number of people who have been checking out this blog even when I was away. Thank you all so much!

Anyway, last month I was hired to be one of the resident assistants for next academic year. The job is so good! The team has these awesome personalities, I will be friends with lots of people and get paid well. But I, unfortunately and excitingly (?!), had to turn it down since I'll be accepting Ryerson University's offer (not York or UofT). I chose Ryerson because I wanted to have spirit of an established alma mater more than becoming an RA, downtown's environment seems more interesting than York campus, and the tuition is much more cheaper than UofT's. (There I wrapped them up).

Humber has been such a good experience though. I met lots of people, I learned lots of things, and I've been involved in lots of stuff. But like my dad once said to me, at some points, we gotta do what we truly wanna do no matter how much we need to sacrifice. I know he is right and (sadly) I have to leave Humber. *Now I realized how much I'm gonna miss Humber :(

The Roommate

Last year, I moved in to my college dorm earlier than anybody else. The move-in day was actually August 29th, but I got here at August 25th because I thought I would need some time to cure the jetlag and settle down. It was dead quiet. It felt like I was the only one who lived here (or I actually was, I don't know). I had been waiting for the move in day. I was desperate for my roommate to come. I didn't know who was gonna be my roommate. And when the move-in day came .... there was no roommie!!!

At the floor meeting, everybody was getting to know his/her roommate, while I, was just sitting there by myself, thinking how sad it would be, a year of feeling lonely everyday. I finally got over it and thought, maybe it was just meant to be. But the next week after, when I got back from my first college lecture, I heard some noise in my room. I was really surprised watching my roommate, Edward-Eddie (Yeh, british), his mother, Kim, and his father, Paul loading furnitures into our room.

Turns out, he came late because he just got back from a vacation in Paris with his girlfriend, Marina. Seriously, I couldn't hope for a better roommate. He doesn't belong to any religion, he always listens my random thoughts, he doesn't smoke cigarette (just the w), he's smart, and he's got a pretty sick taste of music. His only downside is the fact that he is a very very clean guy. While I am actually super grabby. It always makes me feel bad.

He is taking the Film and Media program, which is sick. I get to learn a lot of things about film because of him. I also get along and been having some good time with his girlfriend, Marina is such a fun girl. Since Eddie's parents live in France, Marina and Eddie has been regularly visiting each's place on weekends.

Oh, From the first time I met him, I knew we would make such fine friends.

Last Year

These photos below were spontaneously taken during my very first car cruising experience in canada haha. Terry, Jules, Jenn, and I had this idea to get a picture of us thumbing up in front of Loblaws for our accounting presentation (It was worth it, the other group copied this idea). Before we went to Loblaws, Jenn made me meet her dad, I couldn't believe she told her Dad that the other day I said Jules' mom was prettier than Jenn's haha. It was really nice to meet him though, he is such a nice guy. 

On top of that, I'm glad I met these guys and spent some time together last semester. They were so motivational, fun, and most importantly, they never judged me. Too bad, we got different schedule this term. I miss hanging out with them so so bad.

I don't know if it's because the retardedly fast shutter, or I just suck at taking picture, but everybody in these photos actually looks a lot better in real life.

Profile: Excellent Organizational Skills

This is how organized I can be.

Social

In order to get myself a little bit socialized, I have been to numbers of party in my dorm. No offence, I don't know if it's just me, but frankly speaking, I just don't see it exciting to get drunk and dance by yourself in a small dorm pad with a Katy Perry's firework. I mean I do get it it when it comes to clubbing, where the DJ properly puts on dancing beats, where there are dancing floor, bar station, and lounges, but dorm? Naw. 

So when I went to a dorm party, I always ended up standing and stoning myself, feeling really discouraged to just strike up one conversation. People called me arrogant and antisocial, but honestly I am not. I am just, I don't know, awkward? shy? or maybe because english is not my first language, so it is kind of hard for me to bump into a slang conversation or anything related to what's in for canadians. But that's not so true either, I believe I just don't click with people here.

However, I don't even give a damn on what would people think about me. I just feel sad that I've lost such a priceless life that I used to live in. I am not saying liquors, weed, and all college things are no fun. But, I used to be surrounded with people who didn't even care if I was ever cool. People who thought rock is better than Wiz Khalifa. People whom I shared love and life perspectives with. People who would hang out with me, no matter stupid or careless I was. People who didn't judge or tell me what to do.

Life was simply meaningful back then. While, no offence, people I met here are rather materialistic. Everybody is down to get high, fuck, and earn lots of money. I know there's nothing wrong with it, but sometimes, life is not always about that, you know. Love is not about getting laid or girlfie-boyfie. Money doesn't always define happiness. Wearing branded things doesn't always make you look good. Being impulsive is not the only way to get friends. Seriously? humanize yourself! These things are just ... overrated, or at least for me. I swear I fucking want to go home, ugh.

Moral of the story: If you think people around you are such a keeper, do not ever let them go, or worse, leave them.